Wednesday, April 11, 2007

(Un)Common Courtesy

"How are you?"
"Thank you!"
"You're welcome."
"Excuse Me."
"I’m sorry."

These are words we utter absentmindedly or casually…or not at all.

Lately, I find these words uttered less often than should be. Manners seem to be going down the drain these days. How sad!

I wonder why?

What is so difficult about saying the above words?

I remember once when I was having a really bad cold. I got a call from a friend I haven’t heard from in ages. I asked him/her, “How are you?” Most of the time, I mean it when I say it. As the friend went on to chatter about news of his/her life—I coughed and sneezed through my “uhuh’s” and “really’s.” When I put down the phone minutes later, I realized that this friend never even bothered to ask me how I was—or if I was sick!

On the other hand,

I helped another friend through a rough transition period. She pulled through and went on to do a lot of things that made me proud to be her friend. After some time I got a greeting card from her. She wrote “You were there from the very start. Thank you, it meant a lot to me.” No big fanfare, just simple words. Yet they warmed my heart.

Let me set the record straight, it’s not that I want people to shower my path with roses or fall prostrate with gratitude every time I do something for them or talk to them. Far from it. I don’t mind helping people out. Really, I don’t.

But a simple “thank you” would be nice. Nicer especially nowadays when its fast becoming an uncommon courtesy.

But maybe….life is just too hard these days. Maybe we’re just too stressed out to bother with courtesy. Maybe we’re just too worried about ourselves. Maybe we just need to expend all our energy internally to survive this rat race called life…

So, then..

Wouldn’t a bit of courtesy help us become less stressed, less worried and make life less of a rat race?

Anyway, I can’t control other people’s behavior.

But I can control mine!

So…to all who visit my blog:

Please do leave a comment on any of my posts if its convenient for you.
I am sorry if I have made comments in my blog that may have hurt anyone of you.
Thank you for dropping by my blogsite.
You are always welcome to visit.

Have a great day!


Wil said...

thanks for this post, gypsy! :-D I am also amazed at how some people never say "thank you". For example, I can think of a couple of relatives who have asked for a favor. I obliged. They never bothered to say thanks. Another example, just recently, I had a rude commenter on my blog rin. Saan ang common courtesy naman? Ugh!

Thanks again for this post. Have a fantabulous day! :-D

Gypsy said...

Thank you, too. And you're welcome. Hehe. At the rate we're going, we just might make courtesy common again. What a better world that would be! :) Cheers!

sexy mom said...

it all starts from the home you know...and with this fast paced world nowadays, i wonder how it will be years from now.

kathy said...

Thanks for the reminder, Gypsy. :)
Dito sa Japan sumusobra naman sa politeness and courtesy. I lose count of how many times I hear and say "Sumimasen" (excuse me/sorry/thanks) and "arigato" (thank you) in just one day. :)

melai said...

How are you mare?
still coughing?
drink a lot of water ha :)

Swipe said...

Well, everyone over here says thank you. Most time people even say 'thank you' just for you saying 'thank you.' Sometimes, I feel like I'm going to get overloaded with too many thanks. It makes me feel weird to be thanked when I haven't actually done anything to be thanked. Oh Well, I suppose I just have to thank God for the little mercies.

snglguy said...

There are indeed times when we forget our manners. And I'm admit, I'm guilty of the same thing too from time to time especially when I'm under a lot of stress... my bad. :-(

Nag-palusot pa... hehehe. :-D

zherwin said...

you are so correct on this one, and i thank you for that. :)

though im not in Japan, i echoed kathy's view of being surrounded by overly-courteous japanese who seemed to say thank you for everything and anything, and apologized for something that does not even call for an apology. that maybe too much for our standard, but if we can replicate at least a fraction of that, i think we'll be alright.


Gypsy said...

Sexy Mom, so true--charity (and everything else) begins at home! That's what scares me about parenting..Hehe.

Kathy, haha! Yeah a colleague of mine who lives in Japan said that. Walang katapusang bow at sumimasen. :)

Melai, naks ha--application kaagad. Hehe. Am fine, hope you are, too! :)

Swipe, hmm..that's new to me. I only know that Aussies are famous for their brutal jokes. Hehe.

Snglguy, I think its mainly because of where you live!! You need to move, brother! ;)

Zherwin, yeah. We need a dose of the Japanese culture. Buti na lang we are still far from really being in-your-face rude. I just hope we don't get that far.

Mon said...

uy nakalimutan ko nanaman bang mag thank you :P

Thank you GYPSY
Thank you everybody
Thank you world

actually I'm thankful at pinapayagan n'yo pa akong tumambay sa mga blog nyo. I really am.

Gypsy said...

You're very very welcome.
Really, really you're very welcome.
(with three bows ala Hapon)
Tambay all you want. :) Hehe.

Jen said...

true true true. I have been noticing the same thing. I even heard on the radio that no wonder men are no longer giving their seats to women because they don't say thank you when someone does give up the chair (ang haba ng sentence ko!).... true ba guys?

It is kinda normal for me to say thank you... read Little Miss Manners (or whatever book) when i was very young and it has become deeply ingrained in me to be grateful and verbal about it :- )

I also love hearing thank you from other people (or any other appreciation)... it helps confirm that you've done something wonderful!

Thank you for writing this. Good way to remind people. :- )

ZJ said...

And I say okorn charan from Cambodia. Thank you for letting me be a part of your circle :D

Gypsy said...

Hey Jen, noon, I take for granted people saying thank you to me. Ngayon hindi na...hopefully we will not lose the art of saying thank you! Thanks for visiting :)

ZJ, muhn ay te. (Tama ba?);)

carey said...

i do agree w/ manners starting at home. kids taught about being polite and respectful grew up to be more loving and grateful persons. that's why it's good to teach them how to say 'please' and 'thank you'. i always ask my pamangkins, 'what's the magic word?' when they often forgot. one time, i gave a small girly stuff to my little niece, and i was so amused she kept going back to my room saying 'thank you auntie!' even after i tell her 'you're welcome!' already. it's just so heartwarming. :)

lazarus said...

begging streetkids don't say thank you after you give them loose change.

there are others who say thank you even if you don't know what they're thanking for. pero di bale. I just reply with a smile.

every one should practice common courtesies. for world peace. :)

annamanila said...

Awww Gypsy. Thanks for the nudge. Thanks for reminding us common courtesies like common sense are headed for obsolescence.

Online, I think I am almost impeccable in my tys and yws and howru's but in real world i know may be a bit inconsiderate especially if under stress.

And yes, i sometimes get hurt when the other person after talking a mouthful about self hangs up without waiting for me to say my own mouthful. As though sya lang ang may mouth. hehe

Leah said...

Dito sa Toronto, everyone seems to be polite. People stay in line, they don't cut. We say excuse me, thank you and sorry...We say sorry if we want to pass by a crowded area. "Excues me, sorry!". We say sorry, when we bump accidentally to someone, we say sorry when we sometimes dont even have to.

I teach my daughter the value of Please and thank you. And even po and opo.