Friday, August 29, 2008

Of Tears and Goodbyes

I must be getting old.

I read a goodbye card today from a good friend and was surprised at the tears that suddenly sprung up! It has been ages since I cried saying goodbye. The last time I did, I distinctly remembered it, simply because it seldom happens to me. This is not to say that I have a heart of stone—though I have been (unfairly, though teasingly) accused at times by people who don’t really know me. I guess the reason why I don’t break down into tears whenever I say goodbye is because…hmmm….come to think of it, I also don’t know why exactly. The reason must be hidden deep in the inner recesses of the subconscious. But just because I am hard put to think of a reason doesn’t mean I don’t know what the reasons are not.

Not crying my goodbyes doesn’t mean:

--I can’t wait to get away from this person/place.

--I don’t value the friendship and the time spent with this person/place.

--I am cold and unfeeling.

--I only have shallow, inconsequential relationships where goodbyes have no impact.

--my heart is not right.

--I have no tear ducts.

--I have some deep psychological issues about attachments.

--I don’t need anyone.

--I am impatient to move on (which some of you might have an impression of after this post).

--I don’t care enough.

Well, I guess that’s enough negatives for one post. Anyway, it seems things have changed. Age supposedly does that to you. Well, the fact that I have to stretch my hand out further just to read something clearly should prove the age theory. Figuratively, this might be true as well for goodbyes—the further a memory gets, the clearer it might become.

Go figure.


R-yo said...

Hay..that's why I also am averse with hellos. Goodbyes are just pretty painful.

Beng said...

After saying all your goodbyes there, aren't you glad you'll soon be saying, "Hello" again here? But yes, though we can't ignore the goodbyes, it's a way of acknowledging that a parting will happen. I'm sure the people you met there in the UK will miss you.

But for us here in the Philippines, we will just be so happy to have you back with us. See you! :)

vernaloo said...

when I left i was just teary-eyed hehe but I'm really a crybaby...a weepah! hehe

Anyway I don't see you as a "cold" person. As a matter of fact I find you sweet and caring. Crying or being emotional does not really equate as being sensitive.

Rudy said...

Hmm, if I know... baka next year nadiyan ka na naman sa UK, hehe. :-D

Nyways, see ya soon, siobe. I'm sure you're already salivating just thinking of the fresh seafoods... :-D

dimaks said...

maybe you have this art of saying goodbye :)

Sexy Mom said...

sometimes, we just need a good cry, it's all just human,.

Abaniko said...

Don't say "goodbye" daw. Say "so long." Hehe.

But don't worry. Even if you leave UK, you have already established a connection with your friends there. That strong tie of friendship cannot be broken by time and distance. Sounds cliched but true. Trust me. I'm older than you. :D

Major Tom said...

I don't get teary often during goodbyes. Perhaps I believe deeply how goodbyes aren't forever at all, and every goodbye is a new hello, a new beginning. And besides, it's a small world afterall, we always meet again.

Leah said...

"Why does it take a minute to say hello and forever to say goodbye?"

Goodbyes are necessary so yoou can meet again.

I get emotional with goodbyes but i try to keep a cool facade.

Annamanila said...

From a distance ... something or someone can be seen more clearly and objectively. I know some Pinoy expats for example who discovered their nationalism when they left the country. And it's also true you get to appreciate someone's value the minute you lost him/her.

Oh my, has one year passed? You're now saying your goodbyes there.

Soon you will say your hellos here.

That's what makes life go round.

Pero hindi ba gypsy ka nga?

I also find it hard to cry when or where I am expected to.

tutubi said...

there are no's not also'll meet again

tutubi said...

when there's a hello, there's always a partner goodbye... sad but true

melai said...

I don't show sadness din when somebody's saying goodbye or maybe I was not sad at all, that's why na o OA-n ako sa sis ko when she cried over her gay friend leaving to UK. They knew each other for two months only. But of course, they talk every day, they go out a lot and knowing my sister who really makes friends that easy, I guess I should understand her.

zherwin said...

i am also not good in crying, but when i do, waaaah. :)