Tuesday, June 05, 2007

Household Remedies (Ahem)

The following is not because I have become domesticated in any way, as you'll see, if you read carefully:

1. If you are choking on an ice cube, simply pour a cup of boiling water down your throat. Presto! The blockage will instantly remove itself.

2. Avoid cutting yourself slicing vegetables by getting someone else to hold while you chop.

3. Avoid arguments with the Mrs. about lifting the toilet seat by using the sink.

4. For high blood pressure sufferers: simply cut yourself and bleed for a few minutes, thus reducing the pressure in your veins. Remember to use a timer.

5. A mouse trap, placed on top of your alarm clock, will prevent you from rolling over and going back to sleep after you hit the snooze button.

6. If you have a bad cough, take a large dose of laxatives-- then you will be afraid to cough.

7. You only need two tools in life: WD-40 and duct tape. If it doesn't move and should, use the WD-40. If it shouldn't move and does, use the duct tape.

8. Remember: Everyone seems normal until you get to know them.

PS. I do not take credit for these clever tips (I wish I could!) Got this from a good friend who knows better than to try these at home!

25 comments:

snglguy said...

Hehehe, those are good tips, Gypsy. Now to see if the first and fourth tips actually works...

Alternati said...

HAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAH


That is genius! I especially love #6! hahahaha


The reasoning is so absurd you can't help but literally laught out loud. I did. hahahah

Ferdz said...

Funny, practical even. hehehe

Bloghopped from lazarus

mon said...

hahaha you got me there! #7 is all me

Leah said...

Katawa naman. I'll try #6 kaya..ngeh

vernaloo said...

wahahahaha and I really thought seryoso eto. Imagine I took #1 seriously. Na realize ko na lang na di pala nung nabasa ko ang #2. I'm so gullible lol

Love #5...I'll try this...on my sister wahahaha

Gypsy said...

Snglguy, I dont even wanna know WHO you're doing this to...Hehe.

Alternati, happy to oblige with laughs. Grabe din tawa ko when I first read these...:)

Ferdz, thanks for the visit! Which one is practical to you???

Mon, huli ka!! Hahaha! Now my imagination is running wild!

Leah, really ha, try mo #6? You're one brave soul...this is one I would try at home and nowhere else! Hehe.

Verns, Kaw talaga, mare..buti di ka nagtry before mo na-gets. I would feel guilty! Re #5, naughty ka ha..tsk! tsk!

Abaniko said...

How hot should the boiling water be: 100 or 105 degrees Celcius. I think the latter should be more effective, no?

karina said...

hi,

thanks for bumping into my site. I have linked you as well. :)

cheers,
Karina

vernaloo said...

lol @ Niko..kunyari seryoso talaga ang tanong hehe

ipanema said...

lol...applicable saken ang #4. At least I won't buy meds anymore. I just have to suffer all the cuts!...hahaha

Thanks for the tips! :)

Gypsy said...

Abaniko, why don't you experiment on both and tell us which one is more effective? I think many would be interested to know..hehehe.

Karina, thanks for dropping by! :)

Verns, you think? Baka nga seryoso, you don't know what too much crossword puzzles could do to one's brain..;)

Ipanema, glad to see that you can comment again..hehe. Just in case, magprepare ka lang ng band aid..hehe.

Blogie Robillo said...

Hello Gypsy! I've included your blog feed in the Davao Blogspace (your blog was nominated by Hoop to be included). Thanks for having installed the "Davao Blog Ako!@" badge. :)

Why don't you submit your blog to the Davao Blogs Directory as well?

dimaks said...

hehe.. i thought blood pressure is not brought about by the amount of blood :)

Abaniko said...

That's a good idea but the experiment should use a representative sample of the population. You should also be part of it. Okay, tara na. :)

niceheart said...

On #3, oh no, I hope my man doesn't read this. LOL

lazarus said...

very very funny! a friend needs no. 4. Ako naman no. 5. baka di rin mag effect eh!

ZJ said...

Bwahahahaha. This cracks me up, Gypsy. E, may remedyo kaya sila dun sa mga taong mahilig sumisingit sa pila? :D

Beng said...

Can I make a suggestion with regards to Number 5? If you can't find a mousetrap, just put a cactus plant near your alarm clock. Maybe it will work quite as well. ;)

hehe, seriously (or should that be un-seriously), I had fun reading this! :) thanks for sharing.

annamanila said...

Wonderful, funny and dangerous (if taken seriously) tips. haha what are WD 40s?

Hey Gypsy ... dunno your email so hope you don't mind if i posted here my 5 Qs for te 'interview me' thingie.

Here goes:

1.You seemed to have said goodbye a lot. Describe a goodbye scene )where you figured, and doesnt include moms, and the like) you find most memorable.
2. When the gypsy has settled down, stayed put, how does she plan to change her site to square with her more stable status?
3. Are arranged marriages no longer prevalent among lainnangs (did i spell that right) in the Philippines? Has there been an attempt to arrange one for you? What is you take about this practice?
4. You meet TK (sigh...) out of the blue and he tells you he is free to talk for 10 minutes with only you. What will you tell him? The he asks you for an instant sourvenir from you. What will it be?
5. How can you tell if you haven't had (enough) coffee?

Sorry for delay and cheers!

SexyMom said...

that was a good laugh, indeed!!! thanks, how i love #6!

U.T.O.Y said...

genius!!!! wahahahaha..

Gypsy said...

Blogie, its honor to be a Davao blogger :) Thanks!

Dimaks, I think its brought about by taking this list seriously! Hehe..

Abaniko, I am so honored by your offer to be part of your random sampling but...we must give others a chance..;)

Niceheart, Hehe. Hala, I hope I wont cause trouble to marriages with this post!

Lazarus, Hehe..kanya-kanya na lang tayong experiment..

ZJ, ang remedyo sa mga "singiters" ay ang pagtataray ni ZJ..oh divah!

Beng, try mo daw...then you tell me if it works. ;)

Sexy Mom, yeah, me too! No. 6 really cracked me up!

Utoy, thanks for dropping by. Oo nga, genuis! I wonder if the real author tried all these before spreading it to the public!




Anna, WD40 is a kind of oil lubricant to make things that move more smoothly, like hinges (I dont think it works on human joints though! :)) Still brewing on those questions..

tutubi said...

your tips are so funny

might try them one of these days

:)

Household Remedies said...

Very amusing and original household remedies.