Who Knows?

It’s Sunday and I am enjoying my last few hours in this temporary haven in Baguio. The only sound I hear are the soft whirring of CK’s fan and my fingers dancing on the keyboard—otherwise, it’s pure, unadulterated silence.

My workshop finished at 9 pm yesterday and with the SONA tomorrow blocking my way to the office in QC, what’s the point of rushing down to Manila today? So I decided to just stay here for one more day, chill (literally) and enjoy the fog-enveloped view from my window.

Who knows, I might catch another technicolor sunset like the one I caught on camera the other day! Who knows if I would get to enjoy such a rare awesome treat again?

Then again, who knows if I will ever come back again to this nice haven in Baguio?

Who knows if this nice haven will still be around a year from now when I come home? Who knows if I would ever be able to enjoy this unadulterated peace and quiet again?

Who knows what life will throw at me tomorrow?

For now, I am A-OK and life is good. Cheers!

15 Weird Facts and Feats

Since Wil, as payback, tagged me to list down 15 weird facts about myself, I have been mentally working on the list on and off for the past couple of weeks. I thought myself to be quite normal since I found it difficult to come up with a list of 15 weird facts. Hmm…should I just say I bite my nails 15 times a day? Would that qualify for all 15?

“Oh, wow,” I thought at first, “I must normal!” Until I am reminded of certain facts like…

1. I can only sleep well if I sleep on my stomach, and with my arm around a baby pillow.
2. I graduated 13^th honor after 10 years of Chinese language classes…and am still only semi-literate in Mandarin (I fooled my teachers! BWAHAHAHA!!).
3. I can put on my contact lenses in under 15 seconds--without the aid of a mirror!
4. After a traumatic first-time experience of baby sitting, it took me many years to get over my fear of children…and I have rarely babysat since--even with my own nieces!
5. I am embarrassingly slow at telling time with analog watches…thus all my wristwatches have been (and always will be) digital.
6. I have difficulty figuring out the “open” and “close” symbols in elevators…I am sorry to the many I have victimized because of this…err…lapse.
7. If I do not get to eat McSpaghetti or McDonald’s Longganisa Rice within a couple of weeks, I don’t feel well.
8. I have an earthy, politically incorrect sense of humor that gets me snickering at the oddest, most inappropriate occasions.
9. From childhood until now, I have moved house 24 times—and even then, I am no expert. I still lose something after every move ( a pair of shoes, a belt, a blouse, a pair of earrings, and lately, a pair of sandals, and, soon, quite possibly, my head.)
10. I have seen “While You Were Sleeping” so many times I have memorized the script.
11. I consider “The Simpsons” a serious comedy that accurately portrays/ parodies a certain segment of American society. I feel the same way about “Third Rock from the Sun” which parodies modern society and human behavior.
12. I am proud of the gap between my two front teeth—it gives me “character” and puts me in the same league as Madonna and Lauren Hutton. So I can’t understand why my dentists are obsessing about closing it up or getting me braced!
13. And speaking of dentists, I love to go for prophylaxis so much that she has to shoo me away and tell me to come back after 3 months.
14. And speaking of dentists, I am proud to say I have very high pain threshold. The dentists don’t need to give me anesthesia when I go for major tooth filling projects.
15. And speaking of prophylaxis, I meet regularly with a friend who is a trained counselor, over a cup of coffee. We vent, do small talk, a bit of soul searching and self-examination. She gives me what I would like to call my psychological prophylaxis—just so I know my neurosis is still within socially acceptable levels. (And I guess the fact that I do this would already tell you I am certifiably weird!)

Fear not! I won't be tagging people--but anyone who wants to re-evaluate their WQ (weirdness quotient), feel free!

Like IV Drip to A Patient

Like IV drip to a hospital patient.

Like Diet Coke to a model.

Like face lift to an aging movie star.

Like Starbucks to yuppies.

That is what internet connection is to me, I’m afraid. I came up to Baguio yesterday, two days early for a seminar hoping to catch some R & R before work takes over. I was planning for some peace and quite in a haven tucked somewhere in the hills of Baguio. It’s stillness, I thought, would be such an ideal place for me to rest, reflect and be silent.

Sounds like a great plan!

Until I found out the phone lines were down. *gasp!*

Then I realized that I was only enamoured with the idea of quiet rest and reflection. In the end, this is still pathetically conditional to the presence of internet accessibility.

And so after a moment of reflection this morning, I went off to Session Road, logging my hulk of a boyfriend CK, in search for that IV drip called FREE WI FI ACCESS. The sign on the window outside Zola Café was the sole reason I wandered in.

Not so much the fact that they were playing Pop Goes my Heart when I came in.

Not so much that they actually have tomato catsup which I need to go with my tocilog breakfast.

Not so much for the efficient and friendly service.

If the place were a dump and the service bad, I would still be a happy camper as long as there is free wifi…and as long as they don’t throw me out even if I have hogged this table for the past couple of hours!

Ain’t I easy to please?!

Advices, Advices...

It is great to have so many friends. It’s great to have different people to turn to for different sort of things, like on travel, movies, foodtrips, and pity parties. But one thing all friends seem to have in common is the giving of advice!

Advices on keeping healthy…

Advices on primping yourself…

Advices on the cure for a bad cough….

There are certain peak seasons when advices fly all over the place—like now, when I am preparing to leave.

The most common advices are:

1. Bring warm socks.
2. Buy warm clothes there.
3. Make sure to go to Paris.
4. Make sure to visit Ireland.
5. Make sure to visit the Queen.
6. Try hard to find yourself a husband! *sigh*
   

Guess what.

Nobody adviced me to study hard.

Hmmm….

Perfect Timing

As I’ve said once before…waiting has never been my strength. But once again, God has proven that:

“Since ancient times no one has heard,
no ear has perceived,
no eye has seen any God besides you,
who acts on behalf of those who wait for him.”(Isaiah 64:4)

Yep, you guessed it. My UK student visa has arrived! Just this morning—after much waiting…and what a wait!

I had resolved not to worry but that didn’t mean that the worry wart in me wouldn't rare its ugly head. In those times, I would keep reminding myself that God is in control and He will see this through for me…no matter what the circumstances may seem to suggest.

It took nearly two months before my visa arrived. Those who've gone for studies in the UK have remarked that it seemed like an unusually long time of processing.

Had I not begged off from a meeting in Singapore that was scheduled last week, I would’ve wasted our organization’s money and cancelled the trip since my passport was still at the embassy.

Had my documents arrive last week, while I was in Davao, I wouldn’t have been able to get my hands on it since they would not have handed it over to simply anyone else.

Had I not get the call early this morning for instructions on how to get to our office (a bit complicated, what with the road widening project of the MMDA), the courier would've gotten lost along the way…and I might have to get my visa myself!

Oh well, all’s well that ends well…but wait! This is just the beginning!

So cheerio, mates, I have to go and look for the cheapest way to fly to London!

When I Was 18...

I was tagged by Niceheart on listing my favorite songs when I was 18. I thought, “Wow, I will have to reach some light years back for that!” Thankfully, I realized that I didn’t exactly have to do that since many of the songs are still on the airwaves, if not revived!

Ahh..the 80’s! How do I love thee?

I love thee for letting Rick Springfield wisely advise us, “Don’t Talk to Strangers.”

I love thee for Michael Jackson (when he wore his true colors and still had a nose).

I love thee for Gary V. who sang and danced his way to our hearts (up to now!)

I love thee for the Bagets gang through whom we vicariously lived out our adolescent follies.

I love thee for Tears for Fears who told us its okey to “Shout” and let it all out.

I love thee for Billy Joel who made Honesty cool.

I love thee for the fantastic duo Eurythmics announcing “Here Comes the Rain Again.”

I love thee for the dazzling Miss Piggy, those two funny cantakerous old critics and her consort in “The Muppet Show.”

I love thee for the swashbuckling adventures with Dr. Indiana Jones.

..and many more.

Though I would not be requesting the comeback of big hair, shoulder pads and baggy trousers…!

Anyway, here’s a list of the hits I loved when I turned 18…I wont be able to give detailed reasons why I like them, I just do—and mostly for the music rather than the lyrics—I seldom analyze lyrics, especially since half the time, I can hardly really figure out what they’re singing! Anyway, here goes:

Take My Breath Away – Berlin

True Colors -Cyndi Lauper

Broken Wings – Mr. Mister

Rock Me Amadeus – Falco

These Dreams –Heart

Walk of Life-Dire Straits

True Blue-Madonna

Meanwhile, let me share with you this MTV of Hugh Grant from Music and Lyrics—it just gets me all giggly about the crazy 80’s and nostalgic at the same time, sorry I have no idea how to upload a video so just click on this!!

Award! Awards! (Bow)

For the first time since grade school (where I won an award at a poster-making contest), I won an award, courtesy of Ipanema, Thinking Blogger par excellence (almost hall-of-famer). She has graciously bestowed me with the

(your obligatory applause please....ahem)

I’ve been told by friends that I think a lot—and they do not mean it in a positive way (read: over-analysis of everything). So its nice for someone to look at my thinking in a positive light. I guess that is what blogging does to people who would otherwise need P500 per hour sessions with shrinks!

So I’m supposed to award 5 bloggers with this same award. Honestly, not an easy task since each one of those in my blogroll are great thinkers and have triggered me to think further about a variety of issues—ranging from the serious (world issues, social issues, etc.) to the not-so-serious but important (shopping tips, standards for mr. right, etc.).

But anyway, here goes!

Beng (When I need to calm down and think happy thoughts, I visit her!)

Verns (Yes, dear, you get me thinking funny and weird thoughts!)

Single Guy (I vicariously “vent” through you!)

AnnaManila (Who couldn’t learn from one who has so much to offer at this point in her life?)

Kathy (Mother/Filipina Scientist in Japan—need I say more?)

I wish it was a list of 10!

Anyway, over to the 4 ladies and one single guy to pass on awards to five of their own choices!!

Insanity

Albert Einstein once defined insanity as doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results.

Quite a number of organizations have actually adopted this as a corporate mantra. Some days I feel like I am in one...other days, I think we're only slightly neurotic (whew!). It all depends on the level of insanity thrown at me in meetings and the issues I hear.

There are times when I just want to throw in the towel and join another organization. But I've since realized that each organization has its own level of insanity. So why not stick to insanities that I'm used to and can do something about? Who knows, I might be able to contribute equally insane alternatives that just might help move the cart along? Like maybe triangular wheels?

Now to stop pushing and start fixing those wheels…

Better than Oprah!

Finally! After a week of letting these questions brew in my so-called brain, I have come up with satisfying (I think) answers. All I can say is, the following interviewers are better than Oprah because they let me speak my mind without interruptions of “Yes, that happened to me, too! blah blah blah..” as Oprah would’ve done. Not that you have a choice in this medium!

Annamanila asks:

1.You seemed to have said goodbye a lot. Describe a goodbye scene where you figured, (and doesn’t include moms, and the like) you find most memorable.

Wow, first question and you already pack quite a punch. Saying goodbye so frequently has somehow made it almost a perfunctory exercise for me…maybe unconsciously, this is for the sake of self-preservation. Ironically, the most memorable goodbye for me is when I said goodbye to my dad many years ago when I was leaving for a three year study in Singapore. It was going to be three straight years in Singapore as I didn’t plan to come home for vacations because of financial constraints. I go, “Pa, I’m leaving for the airport!” Pa peers at me over his reading glasses and grunted, “U-huh.” And goes back to his newspaper. Three years later, I come home and what do you know, I go over to my dad and go, “Pa, I’m back!” And he said, you guessed it, “U-huh.”

2. When the gypsy has settled down, stayed put, how does she plan to change her site to square with her more stable status?

I would want to settle somewhere in Davao where many of my friends. Hopefully a wee house just right for one person in a place not too urban (I would need a slower pace of life) and yet not to rural (I still need my internet access!!). I would probably do some writing and lots of reading and some entertaining (brewing coffee and cooking curry for friends!). I would still do some traveling of course, to satisfy my itchy feet. How on earth this becomes a reality, I have no idea..but it’s nice to dream!

3. Are arranged marriages no longer prevalent among lannangs (did i spell that right) in the Philippines? Has there been an attempt to arrange one for you? What is your take about this practice?

I have no idea if arranged marriages are still prevalent here! But I know "Kai Siaw" (where you are introduced to a potential spouse) is still a practice. Nobody has dared to attempt an arranged marriage on me—it would be waste of their time and resource…however, some have attempted introducing potentials to me—which ended up nowhere. This has been a “fruitful” practice for some but not for me, obviously…maybe I am too fixed in my ways and to mixed up to ever find somebody who is a good match!

4. You meet TK (sigh...) out of the blue and he tells you he is free to talk for 10 minutes with only you. What will you tell him? The he asks you for an instant souvenir from you. What will it be?

Oh, wow, may your wish for me come true!! I would probably display my scintillating personality to him (Har-Har Har) and bowl him over in 10 minutes…so much so that he would NOT be asking for an instant souvenir but would rather whisk me away to the altar! How’s that for a delusion!

5. How can you tell if you haven't had (enough) coffee?

Unlike the impression I tend to give to people, I’m not really a coffee addict—I just sometimes feel the need for a caffeine hit first thing in the morning. But if I can’t—it’s no skin off my nose (as some would say.)

Abaniko asks:

1. A month-long luxurious tour in Europe for you---all expenses paid. But right after the tour,you'll be jobless for 5 consecutive years. Deal?

Hmm….does jobless mean no pay? Then if that’s the case, then no deal..I think I would not trade a month-long luxurious tour of Europe if it means being without pay and without a sense of accomplishment—I am not very good and twiddling my fingers. I need something to do! Now if you switched the situation around and say, a 5 year luxurious tour and then jobless for a month—that’s another matter!

2. Which movie character do you strongly identify yourself with? Why?

Eowyn of Rohan. I loved her character as a loyal niece to King Theoden and remaining strong through the difficult times when the king’s mental/spiritual illness. I also loved her courage to go out and fight evil—and through all these she didn’t have to put aside her being a woman.

3. If there's a law in the blogosphere that limits your blogroll to only 3 blogs, which blogs would remain (exclude mine. You don't need to be nice. Hehe)?

Then I thank the Lord to high heavens there is no such law! Imagine if God would put as law that we can only have three friends in this whole wide weary world? Tsk, tsk.

4. Why do you love spicy food?
Because that extra kick livens up the dish! It’s also representative of how I prefer life to be. (Ahem).

5. Choose: a smart and caring husband who is a foot tall or an ugly and dumb husband who is of your height?

Hey, this is a no-brainer!! Of course I would choose the former one—since I am already short, I need someone to help me reach stuff that’s unreachable to me and navigate directions in a crowd. So it is primarily for practical reasons I choose the former one. *wink*

Verns asks:

1. If you are to make a music video of your life, what song will you use and what will be the theme?

I fell in love with Hawaiian singer IZ’s version of Somewhere Over the Rainbow/ What a Wonderful World. I love his use of the ukulele for its background. It’s sweet and melancholic and makes you think of the good things in life. For the theme, I think thatis it—the good things in life. There’s just too much problems that we are forced to dwell on aready so it’s good to insist on seeing life as half-full rather than half-empty.

2. Say you can change a movie's ending, what movie will it be and what will be your new ending?

The first movie that comes to mind is that really old Christopher Reeve-Jane Seymour movie “Somewhere in Time.” Even though I have seen it countless of times in the past, I still get all tragic whenever Chris Reeve reaches into his pocket and accidentally touches a coin from the future that would zap him back to the present and away from his true love’s arms. He tries to find his way back to the past but couldn’t and he eventually dies trying and see his lover in heaven. My ending would be that he does get back to the past and they live happily ever after—how simplistically happy is that!

3. Among the 4 main characters in the famous TV series Sex and the City, who's character is closest to your personality?

Hmm…I’m sorry but I’ve never really even seen a full episode of Sex and the City. But if it’s a movie character..see my answer to Abaniko’s second question! But who do YOU think comes closest to moi? I would like to know what YOU think, Verns. Hehe.

4. If you are a writer of a "what women want" book..what will be your top 10 on the list?

To be pursued.

To be wooed not only at the start but all through the relationship.

To spend quality time with girlfriends.

To be respected for our contribution to society, because of the contribution--not because we're “women.” (none of that affirmative action stuff).

To be allowed to enjoy pretty things without being misunderstood as shallow.

To be actively listened to (versus lending an obligatory ear).

To have solid platonic friendships with men without people speculating about the friendship.

To eat all the stuff we want without worrying about weight or health issues.

To look good without having to spend hours in front of the mirror!

To not have beauty measured according to appearance. (I guess this goes against the previous statement, but it's a woman's prerogative to change her mind, right?)

5. What is the best way to break up with a guy?

Gently but firmly. Hopefully you can still respect each other and keep the friendship without all the hang-ups.

================

Want to go through my brand of grand inquisition?!
Here are the rules:

1. Leave me a comment saying “Interview me.”
2. I will respond by emailing you five questions. I get to pick the questions.
3. You will update your blog with the answers to the questions.
4. You will include this explanation and an offer to interview someone
else in the same post.
5. When others comment asking to be interviewed, you will ask them
five questions.

My House Guest

The first time I saw my tiny house guest was when I was coming out of the bathroom. The guest, probably thinking it was all alone, decided to flagrantly attack my trash can for left overs (too bad for him there is no such thing in my house!). Hearing the creaking sound of my bathroom door, it scuttled out of the trash can with amazing speed and hid behind the fridge. I only caught a glimpse of its small dark body but I could tell (with a chill running down my spine) that this was not of the 6-legged variety but was of the vermin family.

I soooo wish it was a cockroach. Some might think me crazy but I am a bona-fide, expert cockroach killer. Whether they’re flying or crawling, they are sitting ducks to my torpedo-slipper.

Now, a tiny mouse is totally another matter. I hate it with a passion but I'm also deathly afraid of it. The past two days saw us playing an uneasy game of hide-and-seek. Me sneaking around and looking right and left, afraid I might encounter it while crossing my kitchen…and, I’m sure, it is huddled in some dark corner, making sure not to make a sound and nervously chewing on its tail, scared of being caught.

Is there any other situation as stupid as this?!

Or maybe I should ask, “Who has more reason to be afraid?”

1. Me, who has every right to be in this house since I pay rent.
2. Me, who is gazillions times bigger than this vermin.
3. Me, who’s brain (and therefore IQ) is much more superior than this half-witted vermin who, after two days, hasn’t gotten the drift that there is NO FOOD in this house he can get his dirty paws on.
4. Mouse, who knows that house owner is a giant compared to him.
5. Mouse, who has no weapons to protect itself.
6. Mouse, who obviously has not contributed to the payment of rent or utilities.

If only common sense can cast out fear...

Household Remedies (Ahem)

The following is not because I have become domesticated in any way, as you'll see, if you read carefully:

1. If you are choking on an ice cube, simply pour a cup of boiling water down your throat. Presto! The blockage will instantly remove itself.

2. Avoid cutting yourself slicing vegetables by getting someone else to hold while you chop.

3. Avoid arguments with the Mrs. about lifting the toilet seat by using the sink.

4. For high blood pressure sufferers: simply cut yourself and bleed for a few minutes, thus reducing the pressure in your veins. Remember to use a timer.

5. A mouse trap, placed on top of your alarm clock, will prevent you from rolling over and going back to sleep after you hit the snooze button.

6. If you have a bad cough, take a large dose of laxatives-- then you will be afraid to cough.

7. You only need two tools in life: WD-40 and duct tape. If it doesn't move and should, use the WD-40. If it shouldn't move and does, use the duct tape.

8. Remember: Everyone seems normal until you get to know them.

PS. I do not take credit for these clever tips (I wish I could!) Got this from a good friend who knows better than to try these at home!

Why I Blog

Mon tagged me a while back and after much in-depth soul-searching and tapping on the subliminal part of my grey matter, I came up with these reasons…

1. Baring Private Thoughts Publicly.

As an extrovert, I feel better putting my thoughts out there and having people giving feedback on them rather than keeping a private journal and feel like I am talking to a wall. Of course there are still some things I would never dare blog about-especially as I have inadvertently spilled to certain friends I have a blog, thus making this blog less than anonymous…

2. The Bliss of Being in A Blog Community.

I enjoy being part of a blog community. This is an unexpected thing for me. When I started blogging, the only reason I had was the above one. I didn’t expect to become part of a fun, unique and caring community of people who not only share some of my thoughts and concerns, but enjoy (and share) my idiosyncrasies!

3. Dishing Out Corn

I get to “talk” about stuff I feel corny verbalizing. There are things that are better read than heard. Many times these “better-read-than-heard” thoughts and feelings bubble up inside me and I find the need to express them. The thing is, I find verbalizing some of them “corny.” Its easier for me to write them down for people to read, and as you read them in the safe cyber-distance, at least I can’t see the “this-is-so-corny” look on the readers' faces—and because my cyber community I am in has been a great accepting community, I know I am safe to share my corny thoughts without fear of persecution (or prosecution).

4. Serving Up A Bit of Blessing

Outside of myself, I hope that what I share can bless people. I want to share some of the corny stuff that might possibly stir somebody’s heart out there. To comfort where solace is needed, to inspire where inspiration is needed, to humor where laughs are needed. There’s too much grief around already, I find no need to contribute to it (except for the occasional rant I need to get out of my system) but if I can help in someway to provide some cheer, that is what I hope to do when I blog (this fourth entry also helps me sets parameters for myself—to commit me to keep a positive attitude and not allow the “Mr. Hyde” in me take over too much).

5. Polishing My Prose & Prepositions

To hone my writing. This is where I practice writing better since I really love putting words together—not just the art of it but also the skill of it. This is where I experiment with my vocabulary and prepositions, showcase my sometimes-sorry-attempts at picturesque prose and poetry (only one lonely entry on this one). And if I did get my tenses wrong and my prepositions mixed up, be gracious in “editing” me!!

Whew! I never thought I could come up with reasons. See? That’s why I love blogging, it forces me to use more of my so-called brain. So, thanks Mon, my bro, for tagging me on this (you should get your bebé to blog, I would love to hear her thoughts)!

TK's Take of Singapore

The photos below are TK's trial run in Singapore--mostly of Botanic Gardens since I stayed somewhere in the area. The others are from The Esplanade, Orchard Road and the East Coast. It was a rainy, cloudy week when I was there, so no brilliant skies when these were taken! But anyway, here they are!! No more captioning...too complicated for a low-tech person like moi!

The Waiting Game

3.5 hours. That was the total number of hours I spent staring at nothing, simply waiting for the three different counters at the UK Visa Application Centre (UKVACS) to decide if I submitted all the requirements needed and if there were any other gaps I needed to fill. I couldn't even fiddle with my cellphone since every person who comes in has to surrender their handbag and extra stuff to the guard at the entrance.

By the second hour, I could feel a pounding headache coming...probably because I came in with an empty stomach. I stupidly assumed that the whole submission business (since it was just submitting papers) would take at most an hour and a half, so I opted to skip breakfast and have a good brunch when I get out of the UKVACS office. At 1:30 in the afternoon, I came out with my head full of pounding hammers and a stomach empty of anything except probably for acid hissing for something to burn.

Whether I came in well-armed for the waiting game or not, I suspect I would still be ticked off when I was done.

You see, like most (all?) people, waiting is not exactly my favorite hobby. I have done my share of waiting…whether it is for a delayed flight to take off, for a friend to show up for an appointment, for results from whatever tests, for decisions to be made by higher-ups, for problems to be resolved, for prayers to be answered…ad naseum.

There are certain things/situations when I find waiting senseless—and other times when I find waiting worth it. Whatever the case, one thing is for certain: the reason we have to play the waiting game is because much of life is beyond our control.

I once stumbled on a verse in the Bible that says, “Hope deferred makes the heart sick." (Proverbs 13:12). How true! How true!

The wait is especially unbearable if it is something that you have pinned your hopes on. And the letdown that sometimes come after a long wait (with baited breath) can be shattering.

Another time, I saw a signboard at the front of a cinema-turned-church building that announced the pastor’s message for that Sunday and it said, “Delayed by Design.” That time I saw the sign, I was actually waiting for something and somehow the sign was comforting. It tells me that though I was not in control, Somebody far wiser, way more powerful was. He knows what is best and He knows when is best.

I realize how true this is since I found out that because I couldn’t submit my applications earlier (before May), I found out that the agency (UKVACS) that handles the visa submission has waived its processing fee starting May. Then after submission, I went to check my visa status on line through a reference number, and found out that by end of May, the visa processing will change again and become more complicated. I submitted my application at just the right time!

As I wait for the results of my visa application. I keep the above truth in my heart: God, who knows best, delays by design.

-------

My dear Wordpress friends, I don't seem to be able to get my comments uploaded in your blogs!! Mon suggests to ask you to de-spam my comments (if that's the problem.) Thanks, Mon for the tip!!

Musing on Maslow

Two weeks ago, over a tasty dinner of garlic prawn and asparagus spears, I listened to my Singaporean friend talk about her dissatisfaction with Singaporean society. She didn’t have any qualms about leaving Singapore and planting her roots elsewhere. Her main gripe was that government policies, in the hope of creating an almost-perfect society, have, on the downside, stemmed innovation and creativity—producing instead a nation of employees. “That wily old man,” as she calls the Senior Minister Lee Kuan Yew, “didn’t even show a hint of regret when he was accused of being too much of a dictator!”

The problem was, I had the hardest time sympathizing with her. As a Filipino living in Manila and having to endure, day in and day out, the obvious traces of corruption and poverty everywhere—from potholed streets to nursery-aged kids weaving in between moving cars, selling sampaguita leis—I was hard pressed to complain about Singapore society. Especially as I walked home from her place that night at 11:30 in the evening—nay—I didn’t just walk home—I sauntered home in the well-lit sidewalk in the heart of Singapore. Sauntering home is not an option in Manila—either you’ll get hit by a car (since there are hardly any sidewalks for you to walk on) or you’ll attract some unsavory types trying to “earn their keep.”

So as I sauntered home, I took advantage of the safe environment I was in, and stopped to listen to the stillness once in a while broken by the swishing sound of a passing car—chances of it to be either a BMW or a Jaguar are high. I also stopped to take a couple of photos—wondering if I had steady hands to take photos of the night scene (I don’t!). I also realized that I could actually sit on one of the bus stop benches and enjoy the cool evening breeze—without being eaten alive by mosquitoes (I guess they know to keep away from humans--or else they’d be fined!)

Our conversation played in my head again and I realized it’s all about what Abe Maslow said. Once your basic needs are met (food, shelter, security) you turn your attention to higher needs (emotional, spiritual, intellectual). The thing is, we Filipinos are barely getting our basic needs met—so how are we to look beyond that?

Half of me wish I had my Singaporean friend’s problems—but then again, would I be any happier?

Glimpses of South Thailand

Bird Cages are typical of the South. I love their elaborate designs!







Those white stuff on this little girl's face is baby powder. They make sure traces of white powder are obvious--so people will know they are clean!










I love these elaborate lamposts!! They're along the major streets in Yala.











The Michelin Man knows he needs to "wai" before he can sell tires to the Thai!











This is what I never got to do while in Yala: picnic at the park!!







This is a typical Thai house. It looks like an exotic lamp at night when the yellow lights in the house are lit.










On my way to Hatyai, I noticed that the van I rode had a Muslim talisman dangling from the mirror--and a white Buddhist lei on the aircon vent in front of me (dont know if its just for the scent or for safety like the Muslim talisman in front). Ironically, I just noticed while uploading this pic that a military vehicle happened to be in front of us..for additional safety precaution too, I guess!

Moi enjoying the pine tree-dotted beach in Songkhla, Hatyai province.
















*apologies for the lousy lay-out! I don't know how to put the caption in with the photos properly. Hope you enjoyed the photos, though.

My First Thailand Adventure

This is the Yala Train Station. This is the very first place I arrived at in Yala way back in 2003…by car. Let me explain.

I was scheduled to go to Yala from Bangkok by train and spend a few months in this Southern city of Thailand. The plan was for me to meet my host in Bangkok and make the 16-hour train ride to the South with her. Now if my host had just stuck to the original plan and showed up--that would’ve been pretty straightforward!

“I guess you’ll just have to pray for God to send you a couple of guardian angels!” She said via email…written with an evil grin on her face, I bet!

So with a sympathetic friend in Bangkok accompanying me to the train station, I made my lonesome way to Yala.

“It shouldn’t be a problem,” I thought. “I’ll just come down when I see the sign that says Yala—that is, if the sign’s English print (under the Thai script) is big enough for me to see!”

On the train’s third stop, an elderly Thai man with a ponytail sat in front of me. I knew the key thing about traveling alone is to make friends—if nothing else, for safety’s sake. So I started practicing my Thai with him using my Thai phrasebook. We obviously didn’t have any profound discussions on Gautama Buddha but surprisingly, I was able to figure out (or maybe it was more of his communication skills) that he was a landscape artist on his way home to Sungei Golok, a city further South from Yala.

When evening came, a train staff came to make the beds—flipping out the chairs to make beds was an interesting sight. As I watched them make the beds, a lady who was sitting behind me started chatting with me. I found out that she had been eavesdropping the whole time and was actually an English teacher going home to another Southern city, Narathiwat. She just came back from Bangkok after receiving a “Best Mother of Narathiwat” award from the Queen herself! Wow.

The night on the train was bumpy but comfortable. I could feel the train stop a few times during the night but rumbled on again after a spell. I woke up to a sunny morning and enjoyed the view of the mountains from my window—until I realized that the train hadn’t move for quite a while.

So after saying good morning to my Thai seatmate who slept on the upper bunk, I went to freshen up in a surprisingly clean bathroom and came back to see the Thai English teacher smiling at me beside my bed. She treated me with a cup of coffee and chatted for a while.

Then a guy in a brown uniform came on board and made an announcement in Thai. I turned to my Thai lady friend for translation and found a worried look settling on her face.

“The man says we cannot move on from here, there is a train that got derailed up ahead and blocked the rails. We cannot go through.” She said and immediately grasp my hand and reassured me, “Don’t worry, we can travel together by bus, they are preparing buses for us.”

The funny thing was, I wasn’t at all worried. I somehow knew that I would get to Yala—and this was before I discovered roaming (I know, I’m a late bloomer!).

The man came up again and made another announcement. I presumed it was about the buses. I was right. The lady told me with dismay that the buses were assigned to go to the respective cities. So this meant we had to take different buses.

Again, she fussed over me like an adopted mom and discussed my almost-going-to-doomed-fate with the elderly Thai man. Leave it to God to put me in the hands of a Best Mother awardee!

“Come to Narathiwat with me! Then I will take you to Yala the next day.” She said. I declined even if I knew I could trust her with my life. I just couldn’t not show up when I know my host would be waiting for me at the train station…and I knew I was already a couple of hours late.

Suddenly from across the aisle, a man who was with his girlfriend spoke in Thai. I caught the word “Yala” in the conversation. It turned out that the couple were going to Yala. So the Thai lady “endorsed” the care of a poor Filipino lady traveling alone to this couple—who had zero English.

The Thai lady left her phone number, so with the old man and asked me to keep in touch. I said my thanks and went off following the couple to the bus. The sign on the bus did say ‘YALA’—in Thai script—oh, well.

It was a good thing that the Thai English lady had already left instructions with them that I should be “delivered” to the train station where my host will be waiting for me.

On the bus, again I whipped out my phrase book and practiced my then less-than-meager-Thai. After a few hits and misses, I found out that the guy was Chinese-Thai and could speak Mandarin---Hallelujah!! At least I could tell him to please ask his girlfriend to bring me to the toilet on our next stop!! Thank God for small blessings.

When we got to Yala, he suggested I get down with them in front of their store and then he would bring me to the train station in their car. While in the car with them, I saw the girlfriend using her cellphone and asked to call my host. Imagine my host’s surprise when she answered her phone and heard me on the other side telling her I was coming over to the train station chauffered by my new Thai friends in their nice little car.

After staying in Yala for many months, I hadn’t heard of any other incident of cancelled train trips. I also found out much later that many of the Thai English teachers don’t really speak good English and the Thai lady who was on the train with me was one of those rare finds.

I have traveled alone countless more times after that--on planes, trains and automobiles (Vintage Mercedes, to be specific), to further places, crossing borders and on complicated travel routes. But after that introductory lesson of God’s faithfulness, I have never worried about traveling alone since.

Coming Home

Last night, when the plane touched down, I couldn’t keep a smile from spreading on my face. I’m home again--after two years of being away! I was back to my second home: Thailand!

The fact that I had to face a rather grouchy Thai immigration officer at the Hatyai International Airport didn’t dampen my spirit—hearing his sing-song Thai-accented English was a welcome sound. “Madaam, pleet suhtey in fron op kameraaa. Okee…net pehson pleet!”

As with most of my travels, I’m here in business but that doesn’t mean I can’t feel pleasure, right? So it was great to wake up to a sunny morning in Hatyai. The view from my hotel room wasn’t exactly impressive but after having been through a rainy week in Singapore, it was great to see the sun out.

Memories flood back of my time here and all the wonderful adventures I had to endure-- err--I mean, experienced! I should one day take that trip down memory lane and share with you some of my adventures!

Meanwhile, I’ve traveled down one of the least traveled routes these days, that is, to Yala, deep into South Thailand to visit a colleague. After passing one sleepy military checkpoint, it was a smooth uneventful ride from there. You know you are in “frontier country” when you discover that your roaming has been cut off—for security reasons, the Thai government hasn’t allowed roaming in South Thailand since the unrest started.

It’s really a pity to see people kept away from the South because of the bad news that’s been coming out. To me, it’s still great to be back and I look forward to practicing my rusty Thai—and eating the best Pad Thai, ever, which is just a block from where I’m staying!

Sawadii Kha!!

One Day Blog Silence

Silence can say more than a thousand words.

This day shall unite us all about this unbelievable painful & shocking event and show some respect and love to those who lost their loved ones.

On April 30th 2007, the Blogosphere will hold a One-Day Blog Silence in honor of the victims at Virginia Tech. More then 30 died at the US college massacre.

But it´s not only about them. Many bloggers have responded and asked about all the other victims of our world. All the people who die every day. What about them?

This day can be a symbol of support to all the victims of our world!

All you have to do is spread the word about it and post the graphic on your blog on 30th April 2007. No words and no comments. Just respect, reflect and empathy.

My Second Beau

As I wandered around Singapore in between meetings and the daily downpours, I held back from actually taking my first picture with my Canon. I wanted it to be really WORTH being the first picture to grace my memory card.

The problem was that walking down soggy and crowded Orchard Road wasn’t exactly promising in terms of photo ops—but then I guess it depends what you want to shoot. Now there’s the rub. I wasn’t really sure what I photos I wanted to take!

Until I saw THE WORTHY PHOTO. *Gasp* This is it!! I didn’t really care about angles or how artistic it was going to be—just that THE SUBJECT was already quite a work of art so HE can speak for himself. And the way he stared at from the shop window of C K Tang was irresistible. Sunshine on a cloudy day. *Sigh*

This also inspired me to name my Canon. From that WORTHY PHOTO, I named my Canon, TK—as in Takeshi Kaneshiro, my favorite Japanese. *Grin*

The meetings really drained me of my mental juju so, this is a welcome visual. *Wink*

How I Met My Canon

I had been procrastinating about buying a new camera since my old Olympus is already showing signs of senility. My aim was to get one before I leave for Singapore (tomorrow) and of course, cram artists like me would understand why I would end up buying that camera two days before the trip.

There are “reasonable reasons” for the delay—I had to make sure I stay on my budget and get camera out of it. My internet research showed that the Canon Powershot A550 was the right one for me and my requirements.

Then a friend of mine said she had a churchmate who owns a shop in Quiapo and the owner can just give the camera to her at church and I can just send the payment through her. All these sans the hassle of going to Quiapo. But time passed and I was kept waiting by the shop. I called often and they kept promising that their stock would come…”call again tomorrow..maybe it will come tomorrow…blah blah blah.”

Until I decided to just go for the lower-end one which they had on stock, a Canon A430, which was just a 4 megapixel camera. Since I was happy with my 2 megapixel one, so I thought that 4 megapixel should be okey. I can settle for that if the Canon A550 (7 megapixel) one wasn’t available. I know I should check other features as well--but I’m not really savvy so I judge cameras by their megapixels!

For one reason or another, I didn’t manage to make it to Quiapo. The one day I decided to finally go, I was told not to because of that hostage-taking incident near Manila City Hall! Of all days..!

With my Singapore trip breathing down my neck, and checking out the net and realizing that Quiapo is still cheaper than Singapore, I finally took time off work yesterday—at 1pm, a slow time for people, and went off to Quiapo from my office in Commonwealth. In less than an hour, I was in Quiapo (it’s a miracle!). I made my way to Hidalgo Street and decided to just check out each of the camera shops. Nothing seemed to click—not even when I was prepared to settle for less.

Then I remember a tip from blogpal Abaniko about a camera shop called Mayer Photo. I found it tucked unobtrusively in between shops and almost blocked by fruit stalls in front of it. The owner was Chinese and quarreling with his wife when I came in—anyway I took a shot at asking about the Canon A550 and the owner said there’s no more stock and that I should go for the Canon A560 instead.

Oh, I didn’t know about the A560—so much for my supposedly meticulous research! I asked how much it was and he said PhP11,000.

Hmmm, I thought, I brought PhP10,000 with me and made a quick assessment (by memory) that I might have an extra P1,000 tucked somewhere, so I should probably get this one instead of the lower-end A430.

Anyway, being Chinese, I am obligated, culturally, to haggle. I haggled in Chinese and asked if he could give me a discount…I was actually trying to squeeze a word in between the on-going argument between the owner and his wife *snicker.* So he turned to me and said, “Okey, P10,500.”

The shoplady stared at him seemingly surprised at what her boss’ said. So I guess I did get a good deal.

I decided to negotiate with the owner again and asked if I could get a higher MB memory card with my camera for P11,000 and again, to the shoplady’s surprise, he said yes!

So then I fished out my money—tucked in different pockets—in case some resident Quiapo snatcher not on his mid-day siesta took interest in me—I found out I had exactly P10,500--not P11,000! Oops. So of course the memory card had to wait. By the time I finished paying up, I only had enough left to get home!

But I’m a happy camper.

Here’s hoping I get good photos in Singapore!

Inspired...?

* should've been posted yesterday afternoon at 6pm...long story!

It’s 5:30 pm and I should still be working, even if it’s past office hours. But then how do you keep a blogger from expressing herself? I might just burst.

I have a ton of work to finish before I go off to Singapore for a five-day consultation next week. The thing is, the stuff I need to do this week is homework for the meetings in Singapore.

I actually have more than 3 months' worth of lead time to do my homework for the meetings...but there’s one crucial prerequisite for me to do any kind of work effectively: LAST MINUTE INSPIRATION.

Or, you can call it a good dose of panic-induced adrenaline.

Whatever it is called, I find myself so dependent to this “drug.” Does it make my work better? My colleagues say I’m efficient and I do deliver the goods on time so to speak, but of course, Jiminy Cricket who has taken up permanent residency in my head, would shake his head and say, “You can do so much better if you put more time and careful thought to it.”

Alas, Jiminy is probably better off with Pinocchio than with me.

Now I’ve expressed myself…I'd better get back to work before I lose my inspiration.

(Un)Common Courtesy

"How are you?"
"Thank you!"
"Please..."
"You're welcome."
"Excuse Me."
"I’m sorry."

These are words we utter absentmindedly or casually…or not at all.

Lately, I find these words uttered less often than should be. Manners seem to be going down the drain these days. How sad!

I wonder why?

What is so difficult about saying the above words?

I remember once when I was having a really bad cold. I got a call from a friend I haven’t heard from in ages. I asked him/her, “How are you?” Most of the time, I mean it when I say it. As the friend went on to chatter about news of his/her life—I coughed and sneezed through my “uhuh’s” and “really’s.” When I put down the phone minutes later, I realized that this friend never even bothered to ask me how I was—or if I was sick!

On the other hand,

I helped another friend through a rough transition period. She pulled through and went on to do a lot of things that made me proud to be her friend. After some time I got a greeting card from her. She wrote “You were there from the very start. Thank you, it meant a lot to me.” No big fanfare, just simple words. Yet they warmed my heart.

Let me set the record straight, it’s not that I want people to shower my path with roses or fall prostrate with gratitude every time I do something for them or talk to them. Far from it. I don’t mind helping people out. Really, I don’t.

But a simple “thank you” would be nice. Nicer especially nowadays when its fast becoming an uncommon courtesy.

But maybe….life is just too hard these days. Maybe we’re just too stressed out to bother with courtesy. Maybe we’re just too worried about ourselves. Maybe we just need to expend all our energy internally to survive this rat race called life…

So, then..

Wouldn’t a bit of courtesy help us become less stressed, less worried and make life less of a rat race?

Anyway, I can’t control other people’s behavior.

But I can control mine!

So…to all who visit my blog:

Please do leave a comment on any of my posts if its convenient for you.
I am sorry if I have made comments in my blog that may have hurt anyone of you.
Thank you for dropping by my blogsite.
You are always welcome to visit.

Have a great day!

To Keep Me Sane

I’m pausing from doing email stuff and looking up at the view of blue ocean mellowed by the rays of the setting sun, framed by green rustling leaves of trees standing just below my bedroom window.

What a moment to freeze-frame.

But I guess time marches on. For now, I am pleased that I can enjoy fresh cool sea breeze here in Calapan, Mindoro—far from the madding Manila crowd, far from the choking pollution, far from Karaoke-mad neighbors.

Tomorrow, I look forward to waking up one last morning to this dazzling view of the sea. Then its time to pack up and leave.

Part of me would love to stay on in this quaint place in Calapan. But I know that this feeling is fleeting, I know for a fact that I am a city girl at heart…that I (mysteriously) thrive in the smoggy, noisy, in-your-face culture of Manila. That after a while in an idyllic place like this, my feet would itch, my soul would grow restless and I would actually miss those hair-raising rides in cockroach-infested buses. I would miss the air-conditioned, food-aroma-infused, never-have-a-moment’s-peace, sardine-packed malls. Don’t ask me why, I’ve given up figuring that out myself.

Meanwhile, I’m just happy to be in an idyllic place like this for my regular ration of sanity.

What keeps you sane?

Dear J,

The first time I met you, I was impressed by you and all the things you’ve done. In fact, I was so bowled over that I committed myself to a relationship with you. I thought that everything you did was so awesome and made so much sense. My admiration for you deepened all the more as I read your love letters.

I enjoyed the relationship I had with you—more so because of the many things you did for me, and the words you whispered to me.

The problem was, you were more committed to the relationship than I was. I wanted to have "more" than what you gave me. Now as I look back I realized that what I wanted to explore and enjoy outside my relationship with you turned out to be a poor substitute of what you offered me. I was like a child enjoying the muddy shore when I could be enjoying the cool inviting waters just a few steps away. How stupid of me.

As I hurt you again and again with my betrayals, your love never wavered. You waited for me, hushed me and comforted me when I come running back into your arms, crying from self-inflicted wounds.

I often wonder how you could love me so. Why don’t you just give up on this relationship? How could you continue to help me, put your hopes in me, trust me to be faithful to you when I have betrayed you again and again? How can your love be so strong, so tenacious?

But even as I struggle to be faithful to you, even as I fail at times, even as I get back up again and continue returning your awesome love with my own feeble and sorry version, I see myself change. I see how your love has subtly empowered me, cleansed me, healed me and helped me to go on.

There are still times I wonder if I should just let go of this relationship. I am no good for you…I have hurt you too much and loved you too little. But whenever I feel guilt prying my fingers from holding onto yours, I find myself unable, nay, unwilling to let go. Who can take your place? I have no one else if I do not have you.

And so I cling on to you, especially in moments when I feel like giving up and letting go, I cling on. I cling on to you, your whispers of love, your promises and your strength.

Thank you, Beloved, that one day there will be no more guilt, no more hurts, no more betrayals. One day I can love you back with that perfect love you so deserve.

Basking in your love,
G.